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Archive for February, 2008

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recommend me some books!

how’s that for grammar?

I have a credit with a bookseller and I don’t know what to get.  Any suggestions?

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but it is completely impossible to have your indignity taken seriously when you’re wearing candy-striped pajamas with a giraffe on the front.

Just sayin’.

We all have head colds here.  Or, at least, we all have massive quantities of snot.  It’s disgusting.

C and I watched Hedwig and the Angry Inch last weekend and every time there was a song, Chico let out a high-pitched singsong squeal, pinched his eyes shut and raised his fists.  Lucy’s been calling him Baby Punk Rock (or Chico Ramone) but I think he’s actually The GlamBaby.  This is the first he’s shown a preference for music besides a brief period of Thelonious Monk easing him into slumber.

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There are two little blue-turning-brown eyes staring at me from a bouncy chair. Two little fists pump and two legs kick in an attempt to get my attention. But I shall be strong! I won’t give in to the pressure to look over because if I do…

GONE! No more drinking coffee, computer time-wasting, sitting alone.

Actually, it’s not nearly as dire as all that, although we are just coming out of a super-clingy time. And Chico does try desperately to get me to glue to him. And I do need my time in the morning, especially since we’re still nursing constantly and need to stand up to burp and Lucy is back in the bedroom with us on an air mattress next to my side of the bed that barely fits and I have to edge my way out of the bedroom like a giant, sleepy, cranky crab.

*breathes*

It’s just a phase, though, because much like his sister*, all of this random neediness is the big, doughy bread on either side of a laugh-sandwich. Which for those of you who speak ‘English’ means he laughed for the first time on Thursday night. huh-huh-heh. It was very cute, especially since he had the common decency to laugh for me when nobody else was around. See, I’ve been hanging over him like a fool making all manner of strange noise and funny face in an effort to coax out that giggle. And I’ve been certain that he would bust out laughing for Daddy, because he hasn’t been nearly as pressure-rific. But my boy knows better, and I am one happy Mama!

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Lucy and I spent some time yesterday organizing our existing beads by color. It was so freaking much fun. Which I know is terribly dorky of me to be so into something so nudgy, but I find sorting to be rather soothing. So does Lucy. Can’t wait for new beads! Cannot.Wait.

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I need to figure out what we’re going to plant this summer and how. I’m toying with the idea of getting a couple of self-watering containers and trying to do a bunch of greens. We’re definitely going to do some herbs again, and the tomatoes, and maybe peppers as well. What else grows well in containers and isn’t ridiculously difficult for a gardening neophyte?

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It feels like forever since I’ve written something without all of these damn asterisks. My brain is working mostly in clumps these days, but it feels like it’s transitioning back to proper paragraphs. I spent much of yesterday standing in the living room looking vaguely panicked, wondering which of the zillion things I had thought about wanting to do while glued to baby I should actually start. My husband kindly suggested writing and I almost popped him one because, hello? But he’s right, even though I did anything but write yesterday.

*ETA–what I meant here is ‘much like when his sister was a baby, these periods of neediness are indicative of a new behavior or stage of development.  Jesus, remember back when I made sense when I wrote?

Me neither.

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Please to be leaving me alone

After 12 hours of Chico gas and teething (sleep 2 hours, nurse, freak out for an hour, burp, fall back asleep.  rinse.  repeat.) and an out-of-the-blue bed soak at 2 am by my eldest, coupled with the beginnings of a cold, I have reached my breaking point.  Even my punctuation has gone haywire.

I am touched out.  I am talked out.  I am wanting to lock myself in the bathroom with a crossword book and my iPod and not come out until I’m good and ready.  I have never once wished that I didn’t have my children, but oh do I wish I could send them away for a few hours this morning.  No, they can stay.  I’ll go.

Ironically, some sort of primeval offspring preservation force caused thoughts of how much I was looking forward to spending time with the kids today kept popping into my head as I was rocking furiously, hissing shhhhhhhh, in the ear of my son at 4 am.  My mama always says, ‘You’re lucky you’re so damn cute or you’d be dead by now.’  ‘Course, she says this about her dog, but I’m sure she’s thought it about my brother and me…

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Meanwhile, back in reality.  The beads are coming!  I cannot freaking wait.  The St. Patrick’s Day goody bags for Lucy’s school are coming!  I’m even excited about that.  Did I write about that?  I’m too lazy to look back so I may repeat…we’re doing St. Patrick’s at Lucy’s school, which means feeding the class and trying to best the previous parents in quality of goody bag.  I’m kidding about that last part.  Sort of.  I’m pretty competitive.

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The maiden voyage to the midwife with Chico was a success!  It’s an enormous PITA to take him in a carseat, though, so we’ll be doing the next one on the subway.  Next year.  Because I’m all clear until then!

It’s always so nice to see my midwife, especially the first appointment after giving birth.  Sort of like seeing a friend you haven’t seen in a while.  Despite my birth experience with Chico not being entirely what I had hoped for*, it still makes things seem more real to talk them over with someone else who was focusing on the birth as much as (or more than) the baby.

Afterwards I took Chico out to lunch (spinach salad for me, eaten while nursing/burping/wrangling.)  Changed the diaper on the seat of the booth despite panic over potential for pee.  Danced about while fellow diners gawked to prevent total meltdown.   Good times.

*I haven’t written his birth story, of course, but I had a very weird labor–headaches instead of contractions (I went to the ER with a headache and they sent my up to L & D–I dilated 2 cm without feeling anything and we only knew because the OB on duty did an exam as an afterthought), labor stalled, pitocin and the agony thereof.  The upside was that I was much more in tune with my pushing, and felt the birth rather than the pain much more than I did with Lucy.  Not to say it didn’t hurt like a mother, but I could feel the baby coming out instead of just feeling the pain.  All told, I got the pitocin at 7, labored for an hour, and then started to push.  He was out within 2 hours of the pitocin.  I just didn’t want so many interventions.   I also didn’t have any of the stuff I had packed for labor, which was a letdown.  I did have my iPod though, and did dance around to Siouxsie like a big dork.

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Tee hee hee.

I’m being all high-impact today and taking a car service into my appointment with my midwife.  It was either that or leave Chico with C and have him back on formula for the afternoon, and I opted for the gas impact.  Plus he screams bloody murder whenever The Milk Faucets leave the premises so it just seems easier.

Is it terrible that I’m completely freaked out about taking him on the subway?  So much so that I can’t even try it out yet?  I was going to pouch him, but then where would I put him during my exam?  I don’t know how people do it.  I didn’t take Lucy alone on the subway between her outgrowing the baby carrier and last summer.  I’m such a fraidy-cat about stuff like that.  Anyway, I’ll come up with some way to offset the gasoline usage.

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Aunt L came over yesterday with her boxes of beady goodness and introduced Lucy to the world of jewelry design.  And it was so much fun that this morning, The Best Mommy in the World ordered beading supplies so that we can continue here.  Because Lucy is really good at design.   I don’t just mean ‘good for a 5 year old.’  She’s good, period.  I know she’s my kid and all, but since she didn’t get her artsy-fartsiness* from me I can brag 😛

I’ll take a picture of the necklace she created for her Gramma’s birthday next week.  L and I each strung a side and L made the fancy bits and put it together, but the visual part was all Lucy.

And you know what?  I love stringing beads.  I love handling beads.  I love buying beads.  Uh oh.  At least now we don’t ever have to buy presents again 😉

*I did go through a brief beading fascination in high school but I really wasn’t very good.  I kept one pair of earrings for posterity but even those sit in the jewelry box unworn.  I almost dismantled them for Lucy to use but had an attack of nostalgia and had to hide them away again.  Oops, I kept this pair too.  The other pair is better.

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